“There
will be a few clouds today, but not many.”
"The little girl
went missing.”
I'd look
where the girl went.
“We'll
be close to a record, but not quite.”
Mmm. Not
quite.
“Athletes
need to be athleated.”
All Athletes
should be athleated.
I'd rather have a little huge weather system.
QVC has a Titanic collection show called:
“In memory of the Titanic”
Wrong! It's called: We're making BUCKS
from a heartbreaking tragedy.
Said by Anderson on the Anderson show:
“I literally watched it 1,000 times.
Maybe 500. I don't know.”
Anderson is literally sure of himself.
Said by Steve Bryant on QVC:
“It's only a four and one-half quart pot, but it will hold much-much more.”
This 'magic' pot is only available from QVC.
“It
(oil) coats the onions and whatever.”
When cooking,
you should always be sure that your whatever is coated.
“Her
car turned up missing.”
How does
something turn up missing?
“The
weather is having issues.”
Awww, poor
weather.
“There
is a power outage…”
You've
let the power companies 'pull-one over' on you.
It's
a power failure.
Every time I turn on an electrical anything I always say to myself,
“WOW,
I'm having a power innage.”
Said
by the David on QVC's cooking with David:
“A
sharp knife is a safe knife.”
Right!
“I'm
their only child except for my sister.”
Did
you're sister go missing?
From:
IN SESSION:
“TEEN
KILLS FRIEND”
“GEORGIA
VS SCHMIDT”
Now
that's a friend.... NOT!
From: The Revaluation
“Did
you ever ask anybody to tell you the honest truth?”
As opposed to the un-honest truth?
“Ground Round
- 79% LEAN.”
Seems that's
21% FAT. Oh, YUM!
From: The
Food Network:
"They brought
it up to a whole nuther level”
Nuthers taste good too.
“Free,
for a donation of...”
What?
“We're
all individuals.”
I didn't know
that. :-)
“…and
it didn't cost me one - red - cent!”
It cost
someone more than one red cent.
“A
fish is a Christian symbol.”
- Mike
Murdock - Inspiration Network
“Thou
shalt not make unto
thee a graven image,
nor any likeness of
anything that is in heaven above,
or that is in the earth beneath,
or that is in the water under the earth.”
- You
know who.
BUT
WAIT - There's more.
“Joshua marched around Jericho
seven times seven on a Sunday.”
-
Todd Coontz
and Mike Murdock
Interesting,
because the word ‘Sunday’
can not be found in the Holy Bible.
“The
little boy goes missing.”
I've seen
people go to the zoo, but
I've never seen anyone go missing.
“IT'S AN ALL TIME RECORD!”
We just ran
out of time. :-(
“I'm
not afraid of just about everyone.”
“Kalven
Jones is never not doubled teamed.”
If you have kids or know of anyone that has kids
and they are learning the English language;
PLEASE don't let them watch sport shows.
“Winds
out of the North at zero miles per hour.”